Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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