come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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