how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
