cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize