she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
