found the other keg... it's in the tree
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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