Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Randomize
