We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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