Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Randomize
