How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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