Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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