Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
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