So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
