real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
