The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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