i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
