You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
How external is "for external use only"?
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
