Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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