I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
