I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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