the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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