I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I didn't notice because vodka
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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