Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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