She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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