So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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