the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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