Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
there's paper in my vomit.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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