I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Randomize
