Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i think my tv is drunk
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
