I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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