Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
MIDGETS
????
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Randomize
