Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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