Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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