Me. At least after what I've been through.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
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We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
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