Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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