Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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