They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
