i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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