your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?