Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
