I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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