can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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