if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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