The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
