I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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