Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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