guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
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