I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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