porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
