You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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