put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize