i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
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Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
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We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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